Grief During the Holidays: Why It's So Hard

The holidays can be a tough time for grieving loved ones, as the sense of joy and celebration surrounding the season can make grieving even more intense. When a loss has recently occurred, the holidays can trigger an overwhelming sense of sadness, loneliness, and even anger for those who have experienced a loss.

The holiday season is a reminder of what was lost

The pain of grief is often amplified during the holidays, as it is a reminder of what you are missing. Whether it’s a loved one who has passed away or someone who can no longer be part of the festivities due to a distance, the absence of these people can weigh heavily on the heart. As you spend time with family and friends, it can be difficult not to think about those who are no longer present.

For many, there are deep-rooted traditions associated with the holidays that bring with them special memories of family, friends, or special moments. Seeing decorations that remind us of our lost loved ones, hearing Christmas songs that we used to share with them, smelling the aroma of your favorite holiday dish, or simply being around family and friends who may not understand how we’re feeling may bring back strong feelings of loss. It can be especially difficult when the holidays bring back happy memories as they may evoke even greater sadness when we realize we won’t ever experience those same moments with our lost loved one again.

Finally, the holidays can bring feelings of nostalgia and a heightened awareness of the absence of a loved one. This can be particularly difficult when grieving the death of a loved one since it is impossible to recreate those special moments and shared experiences that were maybe once taken for granted.

There are more opportunities to see happy families

The holidays can be a difficult time for those who are grieving, as there are more opportunities to see happy families and an expectation of joy. This can be especially hard when you have experienced a loss at the holiday season. It can be hard to go out into the world and see so many people that seem to be having an enjoyable time when you are struggling with your own grief.

The holidays can also be a time of heightened emotions, which can further exacerbate the grief you may already be feeling. Seeing people around you who are happy and celebrating may bring up feelings of anger, envy, or sadness, making it hard to find joy in the holiday season.

The holidays don’t have to be filled with sorrow though. It is possible to still enjoy this time of year despite the grief and loss that you feel. Finding ways to honor the memory of those who have passed away or making plans to keep in touch with those who are distant can help you feel more connected to your loved ones, even if they’re not physically present.

Ultimately, it is important to be gentle with yourself during this time and recognize that it is okay to feel all of your emotions without judgement. Grief at the holidays is hard, but with care and understanding, you can find peace and joy again.

There are more social obligations

The holidays are meant to be a time for celebration, but for those grieving a loss, the season can be incredibly difficult. Social obligations like attending holiday parties and events can feel especially daunting when you’re in the midst of grief during the holidays. Having to go out and be around family and friends can be emotionally exhausting, especially when you’re dealing with the loss of a loved one.

 It’s important to remember that it’s ok to take a step back from social activities if you need to. Make sure to give yourself permission to opt out of any holiday event that may cause additional stress or grief at the holidays. If you do decide to go, don’t be afraid to let people know why you’re feeling overwhelmed or sad, and ask for their understanding. It’s ok to express your feelings about the loss and take a break from holiday cheer if needed.

At the same time, try to remain connected with people who understand your loss and support you. Doing something small with a few close friends or family members can make a world of difference and remind you that even though your loved one is gone, there are still people who care about you and want to be there for you.

There are more expectations

With all of the festivities and celebrations going on, it can be hard to find joy in such a special time of year. On top of that, there are so many more expectations placed upon us during this time. Whether it's expected visits from family, large gatherings, or even just sentimental holiday traditions, all of these things are amplified when you're grieving a loss at the holidays.

The reminders of what we don't have can be especially hard to cope with, and the grief we feel over our loss can make these expectations feel overwhelming. We may want to stay home and be alone, but sometimes we don't have that option. We may want to stay inside and not take part in holiday activities, but everyone expects us to join in. The expectations can make the grief at the holidays even harder to bear.

Sometimes, our grief at the holidays can feel even greater because of how differently we are all grieving. We want to make each other feel better and, unfortunately, those expectations are not always aligned. It's important to remember that we all grieve differently and it's ok to set boundaries and prioritize our own needs, especially during this difficult time.

Why people seek out Mediums

Even in the happiest of times, the holidays can bring up emotions of loneliness and sadness. For some, connecting with a medium at the holidays can offer comfort, solace, and healing.

A medium is a person who can connect you with the energy of your loved one. A medium may help to facilitate conversations between the living and the departed, offering closure and understanding to those who are grieving a loved one.

People may seek out mediums at the holidays for a variety of reasons. For some, it is a way to remember a loved one and keep their memory alive. It is also an opportunity to receive closure on unresolved matters, find peace in the grieving process, and even connect with a loved one who has passed away.

Whatever the reason for seeking out a Medium at the holidays, it can be an emotionally powerful experience. It can provide an important outlet to express grief and provide a meaningful connection during an otherwise difficult season.

If someone you know is seeking out a medium to help ease their grief during the holidays, it can be important to try to be understanding and supportive. We all have our own unique needs and belief systems that help us grieve our loved ones and connecting with a medium may be a part of someone’s healing process. Grieving at the holidays can be especially hard, and it’s important to remember that everyone experiences loss and grief differently.

Tips to cope

It can be hard to feel joy when you’re missing your loved one, especially during a time of the year that is often associated with joyous gatherings and celebrations. To cope with grief at the holidays, it’s important to take care of yourself and make empowered choices about how to spend your time and energy.

Seeing a professional can be a great way to start. Talking with someone who is not part of your family or inner circle can help you process your feelings in a healthy way. You don’t have to do it alone - reach out for help if you need it.

It’s also essential important to set boundaries. You don’t need to force yourself to participate in activities that will be difficult for you. Give yourself permission to do what feels right for you. That might mean attending fewer holiday events, or only engaging in a few traditions that are special to you.

Creating new traditions can also help when coping with grief at the holidays. Focus on what makes you feel good, such as spending time with supportive friends or doing a meaningful activity. Consider adding a new tradition to memorialize your loved one, such as watching their favorite movie or visiting their favorite spot.

Grief at the holidays can be overwhelming and exhausting, so don’t forget to take care of yourself. Be gentle with yourself and acknowledge the difficulty of the situation. Make empowered choices and do what’s best for you. Loss at the holiday can be difficult, but you don’t have to do it alone.